I hold onto my angst, I preserve it

Because I need it, it keeps me sharp

On the edge, where I gotta be

Why you need an explanation for the way that I work

Can't we ever just be happy and get what we deserve

Get this feeling that I'm making it too hard for myself

Raise my standards, need patience, I'm just racing to hell

Getting older, ain't got energy

I got practice keepin all of that away from me

Always been proud of the fact that I'm different

Now I wanna go back and see where I fit in

Thought I was a man, turns out I'm just a person

I don't like the way you use me for attention then dessert me

When I'm guided by my pride I don't question if it's working

But then I let em down, you can see how bad it hurt me

I just can't decide, do I want it or not

Alone like all the time so when you come around

It ain't too much on my mind but it's still feeling wrong

Wasting energy and time to give you what you want

It's half hearted and I hate to say it

I ain't really too competitive so I ain't playin This life repetitive, try anything

To take the edge off, like a sedative, till I can't think or ask myself

Why you need this explanation for the way that I work

Can't we ever just be happy and get what we deserve

Get this feeling that I'm making it too hard for myself

Raising standards, need patience, I'm just racing to hell

Getting older, I ain't got the energy

Got the practice of keepin that away from me

Always proud of the fact that I've been different

Now I wanna go back and see where I fit in

But who really cares what I've been doing up on the low

Yeah who really cares, I don't think anyone wanna know

I've been here for years, now I finally got something to show

And I even think my friends really listen all that close

I guess it's complicated

Tryna to be a real person in a digital age

I hate to feel this way, but

I don't think I'm inspiration just the person they aim for

Where's your safety, what you pointing at, and what is the point?

You can smoke every op, but you just stuck like a joint

So where you at, where you want, where you really belong

Guess I belong on the road since it's all that I got

I refuse to believe that this is all that there is, but that still doesn't mean that it's destined for me

Life felt unfair, cause I could not live my dreams

Now to just wake up, I would give anything

Why you need an explanation for the way that I work

Can't we ever just be happy and get what we deserve

Get this feeling that I'm making it too hard for myself

Raising standards, need patience, I'm just racing to hell

Getting older, and I ain't got the energy

And I got practice keepin yall away from me

Always been proud of the fact that I've been different

But now I wanna go back and see where I fit

These conversations in my head are getting older than dirt

Run them again and again as I just kick up the Earth

Feels like digging my grave, instead of moving me forward

All the sins I been laying in finally swallow me up

I've been a sore head, all my life

Never even thinking twice

Always been too stubborn to consider even good advice

Never put up covers always had to be the thing I write

Never help another artist, can't let them get to the light

Once I get there, I'ma help him, that's what I would tell myself

Way back when I really meant it, I thought I would never settle

Kept on chasing that perfection, till it quickly drove me mental

This success is incidental of all of the shit I went through

By myself, on my own

I guess it might have been a choice

But every time I tried to speak

No one seemed to hear my voice

No one seemed to check for me

And now I'm feelin paranoid

When ya try to get to know me

Don't you sit here playing coy

Why you need this explanation for the way that I work

Got feeling like you're lovin ain't something I deserve

I do for you, you don't do for me