album cover
Redneck Olympics
Country
Redneck Olympics was released on August 3, 2026 by Maureen as a part of the album Redneck Olympics - Single
album cover
Release DateAugust 3, 2026
LabelMaureen
LanguageEnglish
Melodicness
Acousticness
Valence
Danceability
Energy
BPM138

Credits

PERFORMING ARTISTS
Maureen Hess
Maureen Hess
Programming
COMPOSITION & LYRICS
Maureen Hess
Maureen Hess
Composer
PRODUCTION & ENGINEERING
Maureen Hess
Maureen Hess
Producer

Lyrics

Verse 1
Welcome to the county line, Saturday at noon,
Registration's open underneath the harvest moon.
Got duct tape trophies and a plywood stage,
Sign says, "Leave your pride... and act your age."
Old Earl's tuning up the zero-turn race,
Grandma's calling bingo from first base.
If you think you've got what it takes,
Step on up... let's raise the stakes.
### Pre-Chorus
No medals made of silver...
No podium in sight.
Just bragging rights
Till next Friday night.
### Chorus
Welcome to the **Redneck Olympics!**
Ready... set... let's go!
Mud racing through the back forty,
Seeing who can steal the show.
Lawn chair surfing,
Cooler relay,
Slip-'N-Slide in a bale of hay.
Cornhole champions,
Tire swing flips,
Everybody yelling,
"Don't quit!"
Gold ain't made of metal...
It's a rusty hubcap prize.
At the Redneck Olympics,
Everybody's qualified!
### Verse 2
Hay bale hurdles, boots tied tight,
Wheelbarrow drag by the porch light.
Water balloon dodgeball starts at three,
Winner gets homemade sweet tea.
Cast iron skillet horseshoes fly,
Somebody's uncle judged too high.
Pickup karaoke, loud and proud,
Even the losers worked the crowd.
### Pre-Chorus
No TV cameras...
No fancy names.
Just good friends
Inventing games.
### Chorus
Welcome to the **Redneck Olympics!**
Ready... set... let's roll!
Tube float sprint down the creek,
Fishing pole limbo for the gold.
Mud pit madness,
Belly flop king,
Fastest tailgate dance-off wins.
Homemade trophies,
Big-time grins,
Everybody's family
By the end.
Gold ain't made of metal...
It's a story you'll tell for years.
At the Redneck Olympics,
Champions drink root beer... and cheer!
### Bridge
Three-legged race with cowboy boots,
Fastest one gets barbecue.
Watermelon seed spit finals now,
Whole crowd counting loud.
Five...
Four...
Three...
Two...
One...
### Final Chorus
Welcome to the **Redneck Olympics!**
Raise your hands up high!
From the youngest kid
To the oldest guy.
Mud on your jeans,
Sunburned face,
Big ol' smile you can't replace.
No world records,
No TV scripts,
Just making memories
That'll never quit.
Next year we'll do it
Even bigger than this.
Same old field...
Same old friends...
Welcome back...
To the Redneck Olympics!
### Outro
"Who's bringing the trophies next year?"
"Whoever loses the cooler relay!"
Written by: Maureen Hess
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