Good Times

It was a Monday When we took the car And drove it to the shops- I think it was a Tuesday- I'm pretty sure it wasn't- No you're right it was a Tuesday, Cause Derek had the permit It's a clear way on a Monday Yeah but we parked there So it must have been a Tuesday When we took the car- Did Derek give that permit back? He said he will when he went to Queensland We should chase that up We will Still We were in the car Driving to the shops- I'm serious that permit wasn't cheap Relax we'll get the permit back That's what you said about the vacuum cleaner Well that was different he's got allergies Like what? You saw the rash Its eczema He has to clean the carpet cause his cats got hairy bollocks He should get that thing de-sexed He can't he breeds them it's his Way of coping with a difficult divorce As far as I can see his only allergy is Giving back the shit he borrows from his neighbours So we were driving north- I mean the guy can still afford to go to Nusa Yeah what's your point? He should just buy a vacuum cleaner Look I leant it in good faith, How was I supposed to know He'd take it inter-state and give it To his niece for her first communion I didn't know he had a niece! It's complicated see his sister had a friend who died She's barren so she felt obliged to care for- So it's not actually his niece Well not by blood That's even worse I can't believe he Gave our vacuum cleaner to a random stranger So we were driving north- South South towards the- North? No it was northern suburbs South? That's right The map was upside-down but We got there in the end And parked outside the fish and chip shop Fruit shop- Milk bar- Hardware? Bake- NO, HABERDASHERY! It's next door To the house and home shop We went in and bought a vacuum cleaner When we came outside We had a parking fine Cause Derek had the permit He said he'd give it back! He didn't! Evidently! I won't be paying that! I'm trying to tell a fucking story! Well tell it then I will Good! I'm telling it right now! Well tell it then! Yes I'm trying to! Good then tell it! Fine I'll tell it! We were driving Home after the shops But when we pulled into the driveway Felt a bump Got out And realized we'd run over Derek's cat Who was being held By Derek at the time We took the permit from his cold dead hands and ran away GOOD TIMES.