Paratrooper Song

"Is everybody ready?" asked the Sergeant of the men Our hero couldn't answer so they asked him once again Then they pushed him out the door while his static line unhooked And he ain't gonna jump no more Gory gory paratrooper, Gory gory paratrooper, Gory gory what a heck of a way to die, He ain't gonna jump no more He offered up a fervent prayer, his voice no longer mute He felt the wind whistling through his helment and his suit Then suddenly the silk splilled out, and wrapped about his boot And he ain't gonna jump no more! Gory gory paratrooper, Gory gory paratrooper, Gory gory what a heck of a way to die, He ain't gonna jump no more! The lines were snarled around his neck, connectors on his ear The risers wrapped around his leg, the ground was coming near The wind that whistled in his ear became a nasty roar And he ain't gonna jump no more. The happy days of childhood kept running through his mind He thought about the girl back home, the girl he'd left behind He thought about the medics, he wondered what they'd find Cause he ain't gonna jump no more! Then suddenly he hit the ground, he made an awful "Splat!" The crunchies heard the impact, they wondered "What was that?" His boots went through his tunic, went right up through his hat And he ain't gonna jump no more! The ambulance came screaming by, the whistles wildy wailed The medics ran with happy shrieks to where that mess had bailed For it has been at least a week since any chute had failed, And he ain't gonna jump no more! Well they poured him on the table till the chaplain came around, and he said some words of comfort for that wet and sticky mound. Then they poured him in a bottle and sank it underground. And he ain't gonna jump no more.