How I Saved Roosevelt

That was President-elect Franklin D. Roosevelt Ladies and gentlemen Speaking to a crowd of supporters Here in Miami's beautiful Bayfront Park A group of notables are pressing in around the President-elect's car There's Mayor Anton Cermak of Chicago There's been a shot! Ladies and gentlemen, there has been a shot! Wait, I can't see! No, Mr. Roosevelt is waving! He's all right! But Mayor Cermak has been hit! The police have somebody in custody An immigrant! Giuseppe Zangara Ladies and gentlemen We take you now to a group of eyewitnesses who will tell us What they saw! We're crowded up close And I see this guy He's squeezing by I catch his eye I say to him, "Where do you Think you are trying to go, boy? Whoa, boy!" I say, "Listen, you runt You're not pulling that stunt No gentleman pushes their way to the front" I say, "Move to the back!", which he does with a grunt Which is how I saved Roosevelt! Then! Well, I'm in my seat I get up to clap I feel this tap I turn, this sap He says he can't see I say, "Find a lap And go sit On it!" Which is how I saved Then! He started to swear And he climbed on a chair He was aiming a gun I was standing right there So I pushed it as hard as I could in the air! Which is how I saved Roosevelt! Lucky I was there! That's why he was standing back so far! That's why when he aimed, he missed the car! Just lucky I was there! Or we'd have been left Bereft Of FDR! You think that I scare? No scare You think that I care? No care I look at the world No good. No fair. Nowhere When I am a boy No school I work in a ditch No chance The smart and the rich Ride by Don't give no glance Ever since then, because of them I have the sickness in the stomach Which is the way I make my idea To go out and kill Roosevelt First I was figure I kill Hoover I get even for the stomach Only Hoover up in Washington Is winter time in Washington Too cold for the stomach in Washington I go down to Miami, kill Roosevelt No laugh! No funny! Men with the money They control everything Roosevelt, Hoover No make-a no difference You think I care who I kill? I no care who I kill Long as it's king-a! The crowd's breaking up When I hear these shots And I mean lots I thought I'd plotz! I spotted him My stomach was tied in knots So I barreled Harold! No, what happened was this He was blowing a kiss She means Roosevelt I was saying to Harold, "This weather is bliss!" When you think that we might have missed Seeing him miss! Lucky we were there! It was a historical event Worth every penny that we spent! Just lucky we were there! To think, if I let him get up closer! I saw right away he was insane Oh, this is my husband, we're from Maine He told me to sit, but I said, "No, sir!" This makes our vacation a real success! Are you with the press? Yes Oh God, I'm a mess! Some left-wing foreigner, that's my guess No! And wasn't the band just fantastic? No left! You think I am left? No left, no right No anything! Only American! Zangara have nothing No luck, no girl Zangara no smart, no school But Zangara no foreign tool Zangara American! American nothing! And why there no photographers? For Zangara no photographers! Only capitalists get photographers! No right! Lucky I was there! (No fair! Nowhere!) I'm on the front page, is that bizarre? (So what?) And all of those pictures, like a star (No sorry!) Just lucky I was there! (And soon, no Zangara!) We might have been left (Who care?) Bereft of F (Pull switch!) D (No care no more! No!) R!