album cover
Sweatin
4
Standup Comedy
Sweatin was released on August 14, 2012 by Uproar Entertainment as a part of the album 50th Anniversary of the Ice House, Vol. 1
album cover
Release DateAugust 14, 2012
LabelUproar Entertainment
LanguageEnglish
Melodicness
Acousticness
Valence
Danceability
Energy
BPM

Credits

Lyrics

Do you like the suit? (Yeah)
Yeah, forever 41. That is my look. I was watching Tiger Woods play
Golf. He's the new spokesmen for McDonalds. Yeah, they're changing
Their slogan to "I'm hittin' that." Tiger lost all his sponsors
Didn't he? Gatorade dropped him. He's perfect for Gatorade. What's
Their slogan? "Is it in you?" That's why we've been here 50 years
That's why. Yeah, man. Tiger blames everything on his dad now. He
Said when he was young, his dad pulled him aside and said, "Focus on
Golf, screw everything else." That's kinda how it went down, isn't
It guys? Yeah, man. I'm excited, just got back from entertaining the
Troops, guys. Yeah, in Iceland. Who knew we had troops in Iceland?
Who they protecting us from, Bjork? Come on, it was 50 below in
Iceland. I actually saw a guy offer a hooker 50 bucks to blow on his
Hands. That is cold. I was entertaining the troops in the Middle East
A couple months ago. It was 130, guys. Yeah, I was sweating like Ryan
Seacrest watching Brokeback Mountain. I was sweating like Michael
Vick at Petco. I was sweating like Mel Gibson on Soul Train. I was
Sweating like somebody celebrating Cinco de Mayo in Arizona. I was
Sweating like Snooki on Jeopardy. I was sweating like the president
Of BP getting an oil change. I was sweating like George Bush at a
Spelling bee. I was sweating like somebody hunting with Dick Cheney
Remember that? He shot that guy in the face. That's the biggest
Presidential scandal we've had since Bill Clinton shot Monica in the
Face. Oh yeah. Barack, Barack took a lot of heat on the oil spill
Didn't he? Yeah, Bill Clinton was like, "I would've plugged that
Hole." Hey, everybody said John McCain was old. I almost voted for
Him though. I figured if anyone could fix this country, it's someone
Who was here when it started. Come on, his social security number's
Three. Sarah Palin's got her new book out. Yeah, it's a pop-up
That's the whole joke. And I saw the video the terrorists didn't
Want you to see: Afghani Girls Gone Wild. Yeah, these girls are
Running around showing off their ankles "La la la la." They got like
A wet veil contest. Come on, nothing like a lap dance in a burka
George Bush, what's he gonna do now that he's out of office? He'll
Have to get a job as like a greeter at Walmart. Probably screw that
Up too, wouldn't he? "Welcome to K-Mart... I mean Walgreens... Rite
Aid... where am I?" Cheech and Chong are back together. That's cool
Right? Yeah, they're getting older though. Now they're smoking
Medical marijuana. Michael Phelps got busted for hitting that bong
Then he tried to get out of it, he said he thought it was a snorkel
And then Kellogg's dropped him from their commercials. Why? Show me
A stoner that doesn't like Frosted Flakes. Come on, their spokesman's
A talking tiger for God's sakes. Dude, they're great! Cher just
Turned 65, she's having her tattoos removed. Yeah, when she was 20
She had a rose put on her breast. It's now a long stem. Don't blame
Me, that's gravity. Did you read about that South African runner?
They took away her medals because they found out she had male
Genitalia. Come on, that's just nuts. That is... I wrote that joke, I
.Yeah. Had a big earthquake down in TJ a couple weeks ago. Did $100
000 Worth of improvements. TJ. Oil spill, we're still trying to clean
Up after that damn oil- where's the damn ShamWow guy when you need
Him? Where's that freak? BP finally figured it out though, didn't
They? They put a wedding band around
The pipe and it stopped putting out
Written by: Edwin Yearwood
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