A Gangsta's Fairytale

Once upon a time, in the black part of the city

(Yo G, yo G, you better get outta here, man, 5-0)

(Yo, Ice Cube, man)

What's up, man, what's up?

(Yo, Ice Cube, man, why you always kickin' the shit about the bitches and the ****?)

(Why don't you kick some shit about the kids, man? The fuckin' kids!)

Word

Little boys and girls, they all love me

Come sit on the lap of I-C-E

And let me tell ya a story or two

About a punk-ass **** I knew

Named Jack, he wasn't that nimble, wasn't that quick

Jumped over the candlestick and burnt his dick

Ran up the street 'cause he was pipin' hot

Met a bitch named Jill on the bus stop

Dropped a line or two, and he had the ho

At that type of shit, he's a pro

So Jack and Jill ran up the hill to catch a little nap

Dumb bitch, gave him the claps

Then he had to go see Dr. Bombay

Got a shot in the ass, and he was on his way

To make some money, why not?

Down on Sesame Street, the dope spot

There he saw the lady who lived in a shoe

Sold dope out the front, by the back, marijuana grew

For the man that was really important

Who lived down the street in an Air Jordan

"Rog" to the fella, "Mister Rogers" to hoes

Drove a 500 sittin' on Lorenzoes

He broke out, Little Bo Peep, smoked out

Saw her and her friends sellin' sheepskins

(Yo, yo, got them sheepskins)

(Yo, empty sheepskins, yo, baby, what's up with that?)

Hickory Dickory Dock

It was twelve o'clock

Cinderella ain't home, must be givin' up the cock

I don't doubt it, she is kinda freaky of course

Had a fight with Snow White, she was fuckin' her dwarfs

Saw a fight over colors, too

Red Ridin' Hood and Little Boy Blue

A bad influence? Yo, I don't know

But Ice Cube'll tell the kids how the story should go

(Yeah, money, I said, yeah, money, that's it)

(This is Little Russ in the house)

(Rock that shit, homie, rock that shit)

(Well, you know the rest)

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall

With a joint, drinkin' some 8-ball

Three little pigs in a Coupe de Ville

Lookin' for the wolf to kill

They're fucked up and they want revenge

Them and Humpty used to be friends

Now they're enemies 'cause he's a traitor

Pulled out the Uzi, cruise by and sprayed him

Cinderella hoein' for the fellas

And Mister Rogers is gettin' mighty jealous

Of the cash that the pigs were makin'

Time for the pigs to get turned to bacon

'Cause Mister Rogers found out quick

That Humpty Dumpty was blown to bits

They said that the motherfuckin' wolf is next

So Mister Rogers better watch his step

So he let the wolf know

We're gonna fuck up the pigs, and take their ho

'Cause Cinderella is much too fast

Before twelve, givin' up ass

Double barrels all loaded and cocked

As soon as they show, they gonna get popped

They barreled down Sesame Street and caught 'em

Little Boy Blue is up front givin' orders

Little did they know Cinderella was a fink

She called the cops and got thrown in the clink

A bad influence? Yo, I don't know

Ice Cube'll tell the kids how the story should go

Ayo, man, was that dope enough for you?

(Yeah, you alright, you in the house)

(We outta here, see ya)

Yeah, you better go home 'fore I whoop your little bad ass

(Some bedtime story, huh?)

(It's a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't wanna live here)

(Yeah, good old Mother Goose, remember her?)

(I fucked her)