And now it's time for Silly Songs with Larry

The part of the show where Larry comes out and sings a Silly Song

Today, Larry and Bob are on a photo safari

Hot on the trail of a monkey, or an ape

We don't know which, hence the song

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey

Even if it has a monkey kind of shape

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey

If it doesn't have a tail, it's an ape

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey

Let's see if we can catch it on the tape

You can barely plainly see it if it's a monkey

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey, it's an ape!

Look, there it goes, there it goes, I don't know

I can't tell if it's a monkey or an ape

It's very simple, Bob

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey, it's an ape!

Now, Larry, I'm not so sure

Ooga-booga, isn't that a monkey?

Booga-looga, maybe it's an ape

If it's a nickel, or a salad, or a pillow

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey, it's an ape

If it doesn't have a tail

Not a monkey

Are you sure that's what you really mean to say? A camera has no tail

It's not a monkey, if it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey, it's an ape!

I think there's something wrong with your logic, Larry

Well, Bob, the lady at the zoo said it

And who am I to tell her that she's wrong?

If there's a tail, it's a monkey, no tail, ape, it's easy

But, Larry, a kite has a tail

Then it's a monkey

A comet has a tail

Then it's a monkey

A bubble doesn't

Then it's not a monkey, if it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey

(It's an ape?) Exactly, I knew you'll catch on

Larry, we might need to talk about this

I don't think the lady at the zoo meant to say that

Shh, look, there it goes, in the trees, follow me, it's gotta be a monkey or an ape

I can't believe it's true

All this time I've searched for you

Snap the picture, take the shot!

We're among the lucky few

We finally did it, photographer

We've discovered what we're after

Let me look, is it an ape?

Larry, this is a disaster

It's a monkey

Larry, that's a cow, not a-

That was exhilarating! Let's find more!

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey

Even if it has a monkey kind of a shape

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey

If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey, it's an ape

This has been Silly Songs with Larry, tune in next time to hear Bob say

Oh, Larry, you don't have a tail

I don't?

No, and neither do I

I wouldn't be so sure about that Bob

What do you mean?

Oh, nothing