Day Jobs

Can't stand my damn day job. that's right Hate. oh man I hate my day job (oh man I hate my day job) Yes sir I hate my day job (yes sir I hate my day job) I really hate my freakin day job (I really hate my freakin day job) Mr. Man I hate my day job (Mr. Man I hate my day job) I can't stand my damn day job (I can't stand my damn day job) Man I want to quit my day job (Man I want to quit my day job) But I have to keep my day job (But I have to keep my day job) I really hate my day job (Yeah I really hate my day job) [Verse One] Psssh I hate the freakin bakery seems they seem to make me Into a laughin stock (HA HA!) have to rock the puffy hat Pastry apron with the matchin socks (whaaaat?) God damn I gotta wear this PLEASE; I got a rep It's a lot of times I hide for the hotties not to get a glimpse But since it didn't fly I apply for a nine to five At the five and dime (damn) about that much is mine If I keep the ice cream machine nice and clean Scheme to steal the dollar lotteries, all that's gotten me Is a slew of losers in my cotton briefs Stop with these condescending attitudes, do I have to shoot the coochie But wait, we after snatchin dollars while we chasin comets after hours If it's now, or later I'ma catch it 'til then Resume my duties, replenish the relish and the ketchup Uhh, check check check it, out Everybody gotta work the day, job Mountain Brothers, like this Mountain Brothers just dress like this [Chorus] I can't stand my damn day job (I can't stand my damn day job) Man I want to quit my day job (Man I want to quit my day job) But I have to keep my day job (But I have to keep my day job) I really hate my day job (Yeah I really hate my day job) [Verse Two] About to kill everybody I hate toilin in mud it's straight boilin my blood The soil and the suds to scrub the oil and the crud (eww) Off the apron I'm wearin daily, along with the same type pants This ain't the right plan, I blame the white man a jerk Yo man he sure can yell, screamin clean them white tables Deep inside I really fiend for mic cables Like fables Aesop/I sop, restroom floors with a dry mop Prayin for success doin tours but why stop? Cause Dave Thomas gave a promise, and I wanna save for momma's Birthday, in the worst way, but first stay away from trauma (yup) On Thursday I'ma get a raise, all of fifty cents Yeah yeah hard work they said it pays A dreaded phrase, but better days are comin (that's right) Makin crazy sums to rest and chill in style But for now a lazy bum that's blessed with skill And luck of many, just to feel a buck and the pennies Went from Wendy's to Friendly's yet still I'm stuck at Denny's what? Yeah that's my day job I hate the day job; please, let me quit my day job Please [Chorus] I really hate my freakin day job (I really hate my freakin day job) Mr. Man I hate my day job (Mr. Man I hate my day job) I can't stand my damn day job (I can't stand my damn day job) Man I want to quit my day job (Man I want to quit my day job) But I have to keep my day job (But I have to keep my day job) I really hate my day job (Yeah I really hate my day job) [Verse Three] Took a crack at success and fell through Now can I help who's next in line, you best to find yourself a job son My daddy said but that shit's dead I'm not the one, not me At the job see they got me Chops cleanin toilet bowls 'n shit (Yo that's hurtin) Unemployed, although I tried to avoid it (yeah) Finally annoyed at bein exploited So I chose to get ghost and quit, to do music But most don't know that it's more Than just grabbin mics and gettin applause (yup) It's, hirin lawyers for deciphirin clauses in wack-ass contracts Receivin faxes from industry contacts Racks of EQ displayin bands of frequencies And seein what we can do bout payin these damn legal fees (damn) Talent and management agencies They each gon' take a piece that pays me G's (I know) Please finish your verse and then rehearse it Who purchased the rights to manufacture merchandise? Sample clearances (yup) in-store performance appearances (uh-huh) Production of beats and discussion of publishin Split sheet percentages and it just don't stop And it just don't stop, and it just don't stop And it just don't stop [Chorus] I really hate my freakin day job (I really hate my freakin day job) Mr. Man I hate my day job (Mr. Man I hate my day job) I can't stand my damn day job (I can't stand my damn day job) Man I want to quit my day job (Man I want to quit my day job) But I have to keep my day job (But I have to keep my day job) I really hate my day job (Yeah I really hate my day job) Oh man I hate my day job (oh man I hate my day job) Yes sir I hate my day job (yes sir I hate my day job) I really hate my freakin day job (I really hate my freakin day job) Mr. Man I hate my day job (Mr. Man I hate my day job) I can't stand my damn day job (I can't stand my damn day job) Man I want to quit my day job (Man I want to quit my day job) Man I hate my damn day job (But I hate my day job) I wanna quit my day job (I wanna quit my day job) But I have to keep my day job (But I have to keep my day job) Now you know I hate my day job (I really hate my day jooooooooob)