Present

I feel your presence. Occasionally

Smoke rings and essence of strong cologne

Although I never met you

Your movie is so clear

As it lives in the vocal cords of my father and uncle

And I think you're the one who gave me this gift

As I wake up in the morning. Staring at my wrists

Thinking about how my friend Joey

Taught me how to slit

Diagonally and down towards hell

To accomplish it

What a bitch

To cup water in a bathroom sink

And just wish that your face could erase with a rinse

And I wonder how the gun tasted

On that San Juan Sunday that I only heard about in stories

Though I must admit

That I thought you were heavenly for many years

Back when I held onto my father's beard

And believed in a day when you'd reappear

Now I know I'm nowhere near

I feel your presence. In my cheekbones

When my frowns Stick for too long

And I feel your presence in my eyebrows

As they slant towards the heavens

But tumble down

And God knows

I was born in a garbage dump

But no one told me

'Til I was 17

And God knows that he hates me

Sofuck him back

As I hold 4 fingers to the sky

And try to grab

I feel your presence in boleros

As Abuela's dancing on rugs alone

But nothing can take back what you have done

So you've become a ghost

Trapped in your blank tombstone

With a bullet in your head still showing

As the roots of your feet keep growing

And I wonder where your soul was left

In a hotel still set

With the blood of a mistake

Shoved in the hands of a misplaced saint under. brick slates?

At night when I dream of you

You look better than in photos

With a freshly shaved face

Guayabera that is perfectly creased in good taste

I never dreamt of you

As a rotting corpse or bones

As a selfish person

Though you left a vacant hole

I feel your presence when I'm asleep

Brushed by the wind

Grazing my cheek

And I feel your presence when I feel pain

SHarp in my body

Rotting away

And I feel your presence in my bad heart

Beating for babies, waiting to part

And I feel your presence in every song

I love you dearly Viejo

I'll never blame you

But I wish in my soul that you never gave me this gift

Presence in my bad heart

Beating for babies

Waiting to part

And I feel your presence in every song

I love you dearly Viejo

I'll never blame you

But I wish in my soul that you never gave me this gift