Our Disease

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Is scurvy, scurvy, scurvy

Scu-scurvy

Which is a lack of vitamin C disease

That occurs when your body gets no citrus

It killed a bunch of old-timey sailors

Argh!

Complications caused by scurvy may affect

Your teeth, your skin, your teeth

Your blood cells, teeth, and bones

Among others

Scurvy can be difficult to diagnose

Because its symptoms often mimic those of other ailments

The most distinctive sign of scurvy is a really bad case

Of gum disease

Which occurs in many

But not all cases

Of scurvy

Scurvy

Scurvy

Scu-scurvy

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Is fasciolosis

Fasciolosis

Which is a condition

Caused by an infection from a parasitic flatworm

It's a microscopic foe

It's a tiny little bug

Found in watercress, my friends

That's a slightly bitter green

Which my father really loved

A watercress fanatic

He ate it by the bushel

Oh, our disease will make your tummy burn like lava

Also my father had diarrhea

Delia told me all about his diarrhea

Daddy was in pain

Agonizing pain

His heiny wasn't well

Itchy and unwell

People need to know

What could be squirming inside their food

So our disease is fasciolosis

Fasciolosis

And now we'll take that A

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Our disease

Is my disease

My disease

Which is an incredibly rare genetic disorder

In which several signs of aging are manifested at a very early age

Some symptoms may include

Uh-oh

Wrinkled skin, stiff joints, hip dislocations

Womp-wah

Atherosclerosis

This was a terrible idea

Macular degeneration, hypertension

Look how they're looking at me

Presbycusis

Like I'm a slide, I'm a chart

I'm a freak on display

Cardiac issues

Exhibit A

And general failure to

Well, what about Exhibit B?

Ya wanna know what I see?

Your disease is a bad case of adolescence

Accompanied by anxiety

Peer pressure, bruised egos

And an over-concern about a science grade

About football games

About who's getting laid, who's got a zit

Who's wearing what, who gives a shit?

Your disease is a tough one, that's for sure

Getting older is my affliction

Getting older is your cure

Getting older is your cure

But for me, there is no cure

Few people with my disease live longer than sixteen years

And I just turned sixteen

So happy birthday, my disease

Oh, my-my-my, oh my disease

An incredibly rare genetic, ha-cha!, disorder