The Seven Deadly Virtues

Virtue and proper deeds, Your Majesty? Like what? Courage, milord? Purity and humility, my liege? Diligence? Charity, honesty? And what was the other? Fidelity! The seven deadly virtues Those ghastly little traps Oh no, my lord, they weren't meant for me Those seven deadly virtues They're made for other chaps Who love a life of failure and ennui Take courage Now there's a sport An invitation to the state of rigor mort And purity A noble yen And very restful Every now and then I find humility Means to be hurt It's not the earth the meek inherit It's the dirt Honesty is fatal And should be taboo Diligence a fate I would hate If charity means giving I give it to you And fidelity is only for your mate You'll never find a virtue Un-statusing my quo Or making my Beelzebubble burst Let others take the high road I will take the low I cannot wait to rush in Where angels fear to go With all those seven deadly virtues Free and happy little me has not Been cursed