The Truth Is Boring

I remember as if it was yesterday

You didn't want to look me in the eye

You were talkin' 'bout the future

And forevers and sorrys and goodbyes

Your lips were shaking

Then I said, "Please, don't sugar-coat it

It's nothing new to me, darling;

I've heard it a thousand times,"

And I knew what I was about to come

There is... another woman

And again

The same old story

The truth is boring

Oh, come on, are you kidding me?

She's tall, she's young, she's beautiful, she's changed your life

That's good for you

I if were a man, I'd probably fall for her too

But, y'know, I was hoping for something a little more dramatic, creative, exciting, like a dual to the death, a mission to Mars, something like, "Honey, I was chosen to save planet Earth."

And again

The same old story

The truth is boring

I wish you lied

I really wish you just lied to me

Is this all I get

The most mundane, predictable breakup in human history?

I deserve more than that

I deserve drama, and tears, and gladiator fights

She could have crashed our wedding

Y'know? A Hollywood kind of ending

And again

It's the same old story

The truth is so boring

And again

And again

And again

It's the same, same old story

The truth is boring