Stranger

I’ve been living with a stranger in my head

I’m becoming a stranger to my own bed

I’m dying to sleep

but sleep is not dying to have me now

I’ve been living with a killer in my mind

He’s telling me to kill myself sometimes

It’s hard to say no

when I know I kind of wanted/want it to(o)

And all these thoughts

he keeps on putting in my brain

trust me it’s a different kind of pain

Because when you’re up

against a version of yourself

And you’re the worst and he feels like the best

at blaming and naming

you, for all that you’ve gone through

I’ve been living with a tyrant in my words

I tried to make peace but it got worse

now every time I speak

it’s not me who pulls the strings

And I’ve been living like a loser everyday

I’m becoming my own worst enemy

How can I be a winner

when winning is something I only dream of?

And all these thoughts

he keeps on putting in my brain

trust me it’s a different kind of shame

When you’re up

against a version of yourself

And you’re the worst and he feels like the best

at naming and blaming

you, for all that you’ve gone through