Hazy days, shady lanes

slight gains, major pains

major pains, migraines

name of the game, you pay to play

Sail away, take a night train, a flight on a plane

watch life change, yet remain quite the same, it's kinda strange

what can I say except what I'm saying

and what I'm saying is why am I saying this

why am I saying anything

far be it from me to think thoughts through thoroughly

Ronald Reagan and Rosemary's ADD baby

loved Pogo the Clown till I found out he was John Wayne Gacy

loved John Wayne till I found out John Wayne hated me

guess you thought after that I'd have gone insane, crazy

but instead I got taste for complicated ladies

and it's all connected, says the therapist

sent in to help her deal with the rapist

and the rapist is any man cuz we're all dangerous

it could have been the reverend

it could have been a relative

well, everything's relative

just avoid relationships, stay celibate

take these sedatives to forget what a mess this is

she walked in looking down but walked out looking up

the hell with it, I'm interested in an expert's consensus

so I step in

and attempt to craft my conflicting messages

into something resembling relevant sentences

I say "Nothing is definite, the uncertainty's deafening"

"life's a projector with no projectionist, left to spin"

she sighs and replies

"It's all about perspective"

"You're delicate, sensitive, why are you such a pessimist?"

You're so negative"

I say "hell yeah I'm negative"

"I'm HIV negative and still scared as shit"

So what do you think?

Maybe passive-aggressive"

"or just manic-depressive or just anal retentive?"

she said "You got some personal issues to make amends with"

"This is added incentive"

and I said "aahhh forget it"

I smell something rotten in the bottom of the garden

something sodden, something downtrodden, lost and forgotten

and nobody's acknowledging just how bad it's gotten

we just keep a lid on it till the cogs in our brains start popping

something in the air spreading like pollen

I inhale the oxygen intoxicant and start coughing like

ah shit

wait a minute

get him up

get the fuck up

hard times bring out the dark side

part silence, part "why"s that spark fires in my

hot flashes

time stops, crashes into fragments

of anger and anguish

realizing we don't understand shit about a damn thing on this planet

we just adlib

frantic

try our best not to panic

and when it's all over then we assess the damage

and it's nothing else than a classic reaction to rejection

a period spent acting as if we're not affected

followed by a hollow kind of feeling like a bottle minus liquid

and mine was filled with spirits but now there's nothing in it

and what's the fucking difference, the world'll keep on spinning

here we go

another scenario in this deadly merry-go-round

to which we're indefinitely bound

we carry every petty doubt and memory around

in this fleshy old crown from belly to burial ground

rendered in stereo sound

but can't we put some where they can never be found

cuz frankly they're getting me down

heavy and empty and running out of energy

so gently but steadily the gauge on my left drifts from F to E

ecstacy, dependency, what a tangled, mangled web we weave