How do I stay present but still be prepared?

Spend time with my friends, but show my family i care

Live on my own, let alone buy a house

but im only 20 until i age out

Half sane, half manic drowning in a cold sweat

Hope i'm going somewhere, but I don't know where yet

Wanna go on a road trip but really need a roadmap

People say I'll be ok but how do they know that?

I'm in my panic years

I'm kind of freaking out,

The trepidation of the future's getting way too loud

I wanna be someone

And make my parents proud

The weight is heavier the more I have to wait it out

Don't recognize the eyes of the girl in the mirror

Since I landed here, in my panic years

In my panic years

My friends are posting pictures, when they're out at the bar

But i'm just posting up trying to pay off my secondhand car

I wish I was out with them chasing that high

But i need a double dose of my SSRIs

cause

I'm in my panic years

I'm kind of freaking out,

The trepidation of the future's getting way too loud

I wanna be someone

And make my parents proud

The weight is heavier the more I have to wait it out

Don't recognize the eyes of the girl in the mirror

Since I landed here, in my panic years

In my panic years

I know I'll find myself but I don't know when

I hope the hobbies that turned to chores become hobbies again

One day my parents are going to look a lot more like friends

I won't call them at the slightest inconvenience but until then

I'm in my panic years

I'm kind of freaking out,

The trepidation of the future's getting way too loud

I wanna be someone

And make my parents proud

The weight is heavier the more I have to wait it out

Don't recognize the eyes of the girl in the mirror

Since I landed here, in my panic years

In my panic years

I'm gonna figure it out, im only 20 until i age out