The Barry Williams Show

(Let's go)

One man at the window

One girl at the bar

Saw the look of recognition

When they know just who you are

Seen you on the TV

I seen you on that show

You make the people crazy

And then, you let them go

Before the show, we calm them

We sympathise, we care

And the hostile folk, we keep apart

'Til the red light says "On air"

Did you see our leather lovers

All tied up to the chair?

Did you catch those child molesters?

No one else goes there

What a show (the Barry Williams Show)

What a show (you're looking at)

(What a show) dysfunctional excess (the Barry Williams Show)

(What a show) is all it took for my success (you're looking at)

(What a show) the greater pain that they endure (the Barry Williams Show)

(What a show) the more you know, the show will score (you're looking at)

It's showtime

Got the reputation of a surgeon

'Cause they cannot feel the cut

It looks so very simple

But it really is an art

They call our studio "the hospital"

Making money from the sick

We let people be themselves

There is no other trick

"My lover stole my girlfriend"

"Keep beating up my ex"

"I wanna kill my neighbour"

"My daughter's selling sex"

"My girl became a man"

"I love my daughter's rapist"

"My life's gone down the pan"

What a show (the Barry Williams Show)

It's my show (what a show you're looking at)

(What a show) dysfunctional excess (the Barry Williams Show)

(What a show) is all it took for my success (you're looking at)

(What a show) and when the punches start to fly (the Barry Williams Show)

(What a show) the ratings always read so high (you're looking at)

Showtime

That girl has got no scruples

Not a wrinkle on her face

You would not believe the plot she conceived

So they'd let her take my place

Well, no man is an island

No man is a sea

But this display of emotion

Is all but drowning me

What a show

Oh, what a show

On my show (the Barry Williams Show)

It's my show (what a show you're looking at)

(What a show) dysfunctional excess (the Barry Williams Show)

(What a show) is all it took for my success (you're looking at)

The best TV you've ever seen

Where people say the things that they really mean

I hear my name, I hear them roar

For the one more time I take the floor

Just one more Barry Williams Show

We're gonna take you where you want to go

(Showtime)

That's showtime

Come on down

Come on down, yeah, come on down

Come on down

Down, down

Come on down, come on down

Come on down, come on down

(Come on down, come on down)

Come on down, yeah