There's a blackness that eats inside me

And with each attack it redefines me

A sadness of which realiziing

The cause can be seen but the cure be blinding

With each day I'm dying 'cause of a feelin i'm hiding

That defines me, I cant seem to fight me

Cause I am what they call anxiety

I am what they call depression

I'm made up of paranoia and second guessin

I have a brain that don't know what rest is

And a heart that only sees negative intentions

Of the ones around me, they can fake me out but I know they look down on me

This loneliness drowns me, no one hears the sounds though I'm screaming loudly

I can't escape the fact I'm always wondering why

I just evade what I'm feeling with another lie

I'm drowning in doubt, my stomach's tongue tied

Every day's an ache living with these bitter butterflies

Running round in circles all I see are faces

I can feel the judgement I can feel the hatred

Tell me that it gets better knowing that it doesn't

Tell me to be happy don't you know that you are loved but

I guess you never felt Zoloft's numbness

I guess I'd rather feel hopeless than feel nothin

I wanna feel something

Other than sadness, fear, and judgment

That don't stem from being dumped and

Don't stem from losing my cousin

It doesn't stem from something

No reason or rhyme, just mental obstruction

But I deceive and I just pretend to function

Can't you see the cries of a clown pullin stunts when

The feeling arrives in my mind and haunts it

That's why I distract myself and stay busy

That's why the cynical thoughts stick with me

I see neediness and failure in me

But I mask that shit, cause I don't need pity

I can't escape the fact I'm always wondering why

I just evade what I'm feeling with another lie

I'm drowning in doubt, my stomach's tongue tied

Every day's an ache living with these bitter butterflies

Running round in circles all I see are faces

I can feel the judgement I can feel the hatred

All my insecurities exposed like I am naked

No matter what I do, all I feel is anxious

Running round in circles all I see are faces

In a room full of friends I still feel isolated

Running round in circles all I see are faces

I can feel the judgement I can feel the hatred

All my insecurities exposed like I am naked

No matter what I do, all I feel is anxious