Quartet (A Model of Decorum and Tranquillity)

We wish, no must, make our disgust At this abuse perfectly clear. We're here for chess -- are the U.S.? If so, why foul the atmosphere? I must protest - Our delegation has a host of valid points to raise, Our player's sporting attitude's beyond all praise, As any neutral would attest But we concede the fact his masters bend the rules is not a player's fault We'll overlook their crude political assault And under protest will proceed If your man's so sweet Then why his fighting talk? If he's not a cheat Then why on earth Did he go take a walk? Why let him loose? He'll soon reduce This great event To a brawl It's very sad To see the ancient and distinguished game that used to be A model of decorum and tranquillity Become like any other sport A battleground for rival ideologies To slug it out with glee Through the elegant yelling Of this compelling dispute Comes the ghastly suspicion My opposition's a fruit I don't suppose You'd understand the strain and pressure Getting where he's got For then you'd simply call him Highly strung and not Imply that he was one of those It seems to us There's little point in waiting here all night for his return And since a peaceful match is our sole concern We won't make an official fuss In short we rise Above your guy's Tantrums, dramas, Dirty tricks I can only say I hope your dream comes true Till that far-off day I hope you cope With helping number two. It's very sad To see the ancient and distinguished game that used to be A model of decorum and tranquillity Become like any other sport A battleground for rival ideologies To slug it out with glee