Sorry

You're my best friend

No, you're not

You're my sister, stay in your place

I can't pretend that you're not

Threatening to me, l need my space

I'm not lying, I value survival

Over you

I'm on my own

No, I'm not

I've my sister to fight for me

I can't pretend that you won't

'Cause you love myself more than me

I'm not lying, so often you choose me

Over you

And I've tried to heal the wounds

Make it as if it never was

And I know I've done my best

But I can never heal the scars

I wanna say I'm sorry but I know I'll do it again

I'll do it again

I know what I did but I still don't know the reason

I wanna say I'm sorry but I know I'll do it again

I'll do it again

I'll do it to you

And I don't wanna hurt you anymore

I pull you close

Feel your love

Then I push you away from me

Protect myself

I'm not safe when my boundaries are violated

And it's kill or die

So I choose me

Over you

ADD is my excuse

And with my excuse I shot you down

And I know I've got to change

But I can never work out how

How can I say I'm sorry when I know I'll do it again

Do it again

I know what I did but I still don't know the reason

I wanna say I'm sorry but I know I'll do it again

I'll do it again

I'll do it to you

And I don't wanna hurt you anymore

Lash out in anger

Hit the wrong target

My little sister

No matter what I say

I love you so much I cannot leave

But when family get too close

I always find it hard to breathe

How can I say I'm sorry when I know I'll do it again

I'll do it again

I know what I did but I still don't know the reason

How can I say I'm sorry when I know I'll do it again

I'll do it again

I'll do it to you

I don't wanna hurt you anymore