Have You Ever Been Away

Your 'Fight them on the beaches' speeches make me despair

'Cause if there's one thing we can guarantee, it's you will not be there

Tidying your room, making up your bed

And if your diary's full that week, you'll send us lot instead

Send us lot instead

Put a poppy by my lover's bed

We believe you when you say you've

Hurt your back

Have you ever been away?

Where were you when we took Calais?

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

(You don't know, you don't care

You're just glad that you wasn't there)

Have you ever been away?

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

I'm afraid your 'Rule Britannia' mania doesn't ring so true

If I was captain of the waves, I'd turn the gun on you

Any last requests before you join the dead?

Crap into your Union Jack and wrap it round your head

Wrap it round your head

Take a look at all the blood we've shed

We'll believe you when you say that

It was worth it

Have you ever been away?

Where were you when we took Calais?

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

(You don't know, you don't care

You're just glad that you wasn't there)

Have you ever been away?

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

Liberate the streets of Europe, give our kids a chance

Give them Beaujolais by tap and cheap day trips to France

But you have never seen or smelt this ungodly death

It's like the stench of roasted lamb upon your father's breath

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

(You don't know, you don't care

You're just glad that you wasn't there)

Have you ever been away?

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

Aw, have you ever been away?

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

Have you e-e-e-eeee?

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

Oh, you don't know

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

No, you don't care

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

Ooh, you don't know, you don't care

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

You don't know

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

Ooh, you don't care

You don't know, you don't care

Ah

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)

(I don't know, I don't care

I'm just glad that I wasn't there)