Heavy Boobs (feat. Rachel Bloom)

I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs Dense like dying stars I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs I can't run real far Let me break down what I just said (aah aah) Each of my double D's has the volume of a toddler's head Not bitchin' bout my boobies They look super fly in shirts (aah aah) But if I swung them in your face You'd be like "oh my god that hurts" I'm blind, holy crap, I literally can't see I have permanent retinal damage I'm suing you and your heavy boobies Heavy boobs, heavy boobs Dense like dying stars I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs They each have their own memoirs What you gotta know is that Boobs may be where it's at (aah aah) But if you cut them open they're just sacks of yellow fat Stuff falls into my bra It's a little bit of a drag (aah aah) But when I got to bed at night It's like opening a Mary Poppins bag Whee, candy and pennies! I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs Dense like dying stars I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs Don't need an airbag in my car Here is a list of all of the objects That I can hold under my boobs Stapler, 10 pencils Paperback copy of "Arabian Nights" Dog bowl, remote control Hardback copy of "Wuthering Heights" See, when a star is dying, it transforms into a red giant And if the red giant does not have enough mass to fuse carbon An inert mass of carbon and oxygen builds up in the center Transforming into a dense white dwarf And yeah, like, that's my boobs That's what my boobs are like I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs Dense like a white dwarf I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs They'd be a catch at Fisherman's Wharf I got them heavy boobs, heavy boobs Don't ever forget That these heavy boobs, heavy boobs Are just sacks of yellow fat Like the stuffing of a couch They're just sacks of yellow fat Technically meant to feed a baby They're just sacks of yellow fat