I Can't Drive Anymore

I’m at the top of the heap

Like some kind of Yoda

I push the red button

Leroy brings me a soda

You’d think I’d be happy

There’s gold rugs on the floor

But the deal’s gone crappy

I can’t drive anymore

You know I accomplished so much

By my one hundredth day

At least that’s what everyone

On my staff gets to say

I’ve ordered some bombing

Very light on the gore

Even that wasn’t calming

I can’t drive anymore

Can’t enjoy the thrill

Of my foot on the gas

Cruising up Madison

Checking out some ass

Can’t cruise down the FDR

That’s what my minders warn

Got to use Twitter

‘Cause I can’t honk the hell out of my horn

SOLO

I hear Hail To The Chief

’til it comes out of my ears

I settled my suits

Got in front of my arrears

I thought this would be easy

When I walked through the door

Who would have imagined

I can’t drive anymore

No

I can’t drive anymore