Country as F**k

I'm a shade tree mechanic, got a one-ton truck

I drink a thirty-pack a day 'cause I'm country as fuck

Call me Lil Nas, call me Tim McGraw

Not a moment too soon I had horses in the stall

I go to Piggly Wiggly, call out on my CB

Steal a VCR and jimmy-rig it to my TV

Hot dog, holly golly, dagnabbit

I was two years old when I shot my first rabbit

Only got one hat, if you touch it then you die

Unless you're blonde, you can dance and cinch a hogtie

Hot dog, holly golly, dagnabbit, damn son

If I don't catch a check I'm gonna sell my wife's gun

'Cause I'm country, livin' it up

So dang country, you ain't country enough

Make my own definition, beat the system

'Bout to start a new religion

Call it country, country as fuck

Oh, NASCAR, dive bar, fireworks, guitar

Ridin' mower, landowner, '83 Texoma

I was drivin' tractors before it got sexy

Real cowboys don't rock to Kenny Chesney

Catfishin', skinny dippin', bonfires, big tires

Willie Nelson, candy meltin' summer sun, shootin' guns

Hot dog, holly golly, dagnabbit

I ain't gotta sell my soul, if I want it then I grab it

Hot dog, holly golly, dagnabbit, damn son

I'm about to cash a check, buy a Yeti from a plug

I'm country, livin' it up

So dang country, you ain't country enough

Make my own definition, beat the system

'Bout to start a new religion

Call it country, country as fuck

I'm country as fuck, I make my own definition

Start a new religion, beat the system

Hot dog, holly golly, dagnabbit

If you bump into me I'ma always say sorry

Candy-painted Harley, beer pong at the party

All the girls are wild, yeah, country girls are naughty

Hot dog, holly golly, dagnabbit, damn son

I'm country, livin' it up

So dang country, you ain't country enough

Make my own definition, beat the system

'Bout to start a new religion

Call it country

I'm country, country as fuck