Hood Bitches & White Girlfriends

But that's the thing about me, see, I love hood bitches

I love hood bitches, I do

Fuck security, I don't need no security

I keep two, three hood bitches with me at all times

I do, I am, because one thing I like about hood bitches

See, hood bitches have a whole nother sense of reasoning than regular women

They really do, they really do

Like, let's say, let's say you're out with the bitches you work with

Now, you know the bitches you work with

That's a whole nother type of bitch than your regular friends, right?

You know when you're with the bitches you work with

You don't do everything you do in front of the bitches you work with

When they try to hand you the blunt, don't hit it

No, so let's say you're out at the club, and you're with the bitches you work with

Y'all in the club, y'all having a good time

Y'all drinking, getting fucked up

All of a sudden, they see you swerve a little bit

They be like, oh, uh-uh, Samoa, we're cutting you off

That's it, no more for you, that's it

But then you out with your hood bitches

Y'all in the club, y'all getting fucked up drinking

All of a sudden, you feel your damn self swerve

You be like, oh, girl, uh-uh, that's it, I can't drink no more

I'm done, you know I got to drive

She's going to stop and be like, uh-uh, bitch

I paid seven motherfucking dollars for that drink, girl

You better drink that motherfucking drink

I know you got to drive, bitch, but I'll just follow you home, bitch, uh-uh

You be like, I don't want to waste this bitch's seven dollars, hold on

Then I like hanging out with my white girlfriends

Oh, when you hang out with your white girlfriends, oh, the sky's the limit

Y'all have a good motherfucking time, oh, yeah

Yeah, but the only thing about when you're hanging out

With your white girlfriends, you got to be careful

Because once y'all get to drinking and cutting up and acting crazy and shit

You got to be careful, you can't leave them at the table with your man

Because when you go to the bathroom, she'll suck his dick

While you're in the bathroom, but she'll tell you about it when you get

You're like, oh, my God, I sucked Jane's dick while you were in the bathroom

I thought it would make us closer as friend

We stand there like, bitch, you did what?

Jane's be standing there rubbing his dick like

I thought y'all talked about it and shit

Be like, ****, you know we ain't talking about no shit like that

But that's what I like about white people

See, white people are some of the most uninhibited people I have ever met in my life

Things that you are probably insecure about, white people will see them

And use them in your introduction like it ain't shit

They'll be like, let me introduce you to my girlfriend Jackie

She has a little bit of a weight problem

She's somewhat of an overbite, and her son has down syndrome

Come on, let me introduce you to Jackie

Jackie be standing there like, weight problem? Overbite?

What the bitch talking about me?

Whereas black people, we know what the fuck is wrong with Jackie

But we ain't going to say shit about Jackie flaws

'Til we find out that Jackie done got slick and said some shit about us

And that's when we set it the fuck off, oh, no, the fuck she didn't

A monkey mouth motherfucker, fuck that fat bitch

Her aunt is a retarded ass son, she started it with us

But ain't nothing better than hood bitches, ain't nothing better than hood bitches

You ever have a hood bitch try to trick you into watching her kids

No, I got a girlfriend, this bitch got six kids

She always be trying to fake like, she's having a barbecue and cook out of shit

So motherfucking come over and watch her kids

Another bitch got me one time, she was like, girl, what are you doing?

I got Ray on bootleg, come on over, I'm going to throw some steaks on the grill

I got over there, the bitch put the DVD on, put the steaks on the grill and left

I looked around and seen all the motherfucking kids, I left right behind her

I saw that bitch on her cell phone, she told my girl who's watching my kids

I said, bitch, Ray watching your kids

And I think he gets ready, let your steaks burn shit