Conflicted (feat. Svar)

I wouldn't change her with another

She is nothing like I've seen before

But sometimes it gets hard

When I'm at home and she is out the door

I wouldn't change a thing about her

It is all of her that I adore

But sometimes it gets dark

When she tells me bout what she wants to explore

There is something wrong with my appetite

When I know she's gone and out for the night

I tell myself to put it all to the side

But I know that I can't cause she's chasing her highs

Give zero fucks

But I got no luck

She's out for drugs

And it fucks up my guts

I must adjust

She has got my trust

But I am just worried

Of what she might become

She knows how I feel

I know that she cares

What we have is real

I'm feeling so blessed

It's all that I want

It's wounds from the past

We came to agree

We're making this last

Still I am laying here

Waiting so patiently

'Til it's all over

The conflicts will disappear

Fighting my standards

My love and the hazards

that come with difficult choices and matters

The sparkle in her eyes slowly fading

Whispers from her lips lacking basics

Twisted by the highs to find ghosts

And altered by the toxins for coping

All of the tears they will combine

You're soul is open

You don't think I notice

All of the fears are left behind

And words unspoken of

Will keep on holding me tighter

Conflicted with the things wrong with me

Hopelessly stranded

In the dark blue sea

I am staring in the mirror

But my eyes keep sagging down

I have sworn that I'm a winner

Wear my thorns just like a crown

And I've been trying

Not to waste more time

But I'm stuck in the decay

I'll mold myself a better me

In the hope that they would stay