You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch (feat. k.d. lang)

All the windows were dark

No one knew he was there

All the Whos were all dreaming

Sweet dreams without care

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch

You really are a heel

You're as cuddly as a cactus

You're as charming as an eel

Mr. Grinch

You're a banana with a greasy black peel

You're a monster, Mr. Grinch

Your heart's an empty hole

Your brain is full of spiders

You've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch

I wouldn't touch you with a 39 and a half foot pole

All I need is a reindeer!

So he took his dog Max, and he took some black thread

And he tied a big horn on the top of his head

Then the Grinch said, "Giddyup!"

And the sleigh started down

To the homes where the Whos lay a-snooze in their town

"This is stop number one," the old Grinchy Clause hissed

As she climbed to the roof, empty bags in her fist

Then he slid down the chimney, a rather tight pitch

But if Santa could do it, then so could the Grinch

Then he slithered and slunked, with a smile most unpleasant

Around the whole room, and took every present

Pop-guns! Pompanos!  And cookies!  And drums!

Checkerboards!  Mistle beads!  Popcorn! And plums!

And he stuffed them in bags

Then the Grinch, very numbly, stuffed all the bags

One by one, up the chimney

You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch

You're a nasty, wasty skunk

Your heart is full of unwashed socks

Your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch

The three words that best describe you, are as follows

And I quote, "Stink, stank, stunk"

You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch

With a nauseous super naus

You're a crooked jerky jockey

And you drive a crooked house, Mr. Grinch

You're a three decker sour kraut and toad stool sandwich

With arsenic sauce!