Ain't no Jenny Craig here 'cuz we like being large

Ain't no Slim Fast shake, I'm built to last and bake

Ain't no Weight Watcher, I come to gebity-get-getcha

The boogiemen friends shake you down like a Quaker

I'm so phat that I'm challenged spatially

I got my own pad and I'm living palatially

Hay is for horses and J is for jacks

I got the type of tone to keep the phillies on their backs

When I'm mackin', but that ain't that often

You know G that O.P.P. could land you in a coffin

Like a Tropicana Twister with the flavor nature never intended

I come highly recommended

Like an old Dodge Dart and nowhere near a Jag

You be rippin out a fart from your colostomy bag

Obese like Ed Meese, Mason Reese and Orson Welles

I grab a cane citizen and walk my highway to hell

And I'm walkin'

Walkin' down this twisted trail, highway, my way

I live my wicked tale, highway to hell

Walkin' down this twisted trail highway, my way

I know I will prevail, highway to hell

I'm like an old set of Pumas or a deuce of newborn Keds

I hit the concrete street and rock the beat to bob your heads

I got the guitar, I even got the case

But I still can't get that even tanned look on my face

My skin tone is blue like the whale Shamu II

Crustacean of the nation with things to do

I'm Phat on the mic like Oprah, rip your head off like Orca

Got loot to count like Count Chocula

My hips got hops like a micro-brewery

Micronaut robot, got funk like your laundry

The bunk-sock, disc-jock, gets cold cocked

When I choose to rock I'm like a diamond in hock

Mock two, mock three, I can rock it they'll see

Mock four, mock five, I'm here to do the hand jive

Obese like Ed Meese, Mason Reese and Orson Welles

Grab a cane citizen and walk that highway to hell

And I'm walkin'

Walkin' down this twisted trail, highway, my way

I live my wicked tale, highway to hell

Walkin' down this twisted trail highway, my way

I know I will prevail, highway to hell

Mary had a little lamb and it's fleece was white as snow

Mary had a little lamb and it's fleece was white as snow

I don't retire to no Lauderdale without my lauds and laurels

What you want out of life before the show's finally over?

If I'm not out to sea then I'm always out to lunch

I crunch and Munch much Fiddle Faddle back up in the saddle

Sore sucker, all day sucker, Blow-Pop pucker

Feelin Kind of Blue, raspberry Slush Puppie hue

Don't sit by let it pass by pell mell

Grab a cane citizen and walk that highway to hell

And I'm walking

Walkin' down this twisted trail, highway, my way

I live my wicked tale, highway to hell

Walkin' down this twisted trail highway, my way

I know I will prevail, highway to hell

I know I will prevail, I know I will prevail

I know I will prevail, highway to hell

I know I will prevail, I know I will prevail

I know I will prevail