Eat your heart out, Johnny B

Apollo came down and was good to me

He set me on fire and sang me a tune

And he mixed up my mind like a crazy cartoon

And now I'm callin' the doctor

'Cause I'm ringing like a bell

And I play the guitar like a demon from Hell

'Cause I was once a normal kid

'Til the Devil came down and flipped my lid

He gave me a switchblade, he gave me a muse

And he vomited acid all over my shoes

And now I'm screaming and sinning

And I'm doing it well

And my head is a-spinning like a demon from Hell

Now I'm not normal, and I can't understand

What it takes to be a normal man

I go so loco into the unknown

I'm a-screaming evil on your telephone

Yeah, I'm fucking and sucking

And I'm casting a spell

And I'm stabbing the pitchfork like a demon from Hell

Yeah, I'm callin' the doctor

'Cause I'm ringing like a bell

And I play the guitar like a demon from Hell