The Great Joe Bob (A Regional Tragedy)

He was a pan handle prince School boy football king I told him hi in the halls 'Cause he could run them balls But it was rumored down deep he was mean He dated high tone girls With frosty pom pom curls But he never gave out his ring He was the best of the best He met the gridiron test An there ain't nothing As American and clean He was the pride of the backfield Ah, the hero of his day Yeah, he carried the ball for the red and blue They won District Triple-A And his name made all the papers As the best they'd ever had Yeah, so nobody understood it When the great Joe Bob went bad He first lost his scholarship To Texas Tech For drinking during training And breaking the coach's neck Then he got suspended Ah, for acting obscene Around the cum laudy, cum laudy The Daughter of the Dean So took up with a waitress named Loose Ruby Cole While she was a hopping tables Down at the hi D ho And he met her on the sly When her daddy weren't around Ah, but he stopped making yardage When he started messing around He was the pride of the backfield Ah, the hero of his day Yeah, he carried the ball for the red and blue They won District Triple-A And his name made all the papers As the best they'd ever had Yeah, so nobody understood it When the Great Joe Bob went bad Yeah, it spread like a country wildfire That something big had gone all strange Joe Bob the greatest halfback Was acting half deranged He'd been seen out with this woman Getting drunk and having fun Yeah, he growned his hair, then give up prayer "To the Football days is done" Then he and old Loose Ruby Robbed a Pinkie's Liquor Store And had a run in with the law When they's running out the door And Joe Bob's fate was sealed For the next century Yeah, he traded in the pig skin For the penitentiary He was the pride of the backfield Ah, the hero of his day Yeah, he carried the ball for the red and blue But Helen carried it all the way And his name made all the papers As the best they'd ever had Yeah, so nobody understood it, nobody comprehended When the great Joe Bob went bad