Who's Crazy / My Psychopharmacologist and I

Who's crazy The husband or wife Who's crazy To live their whole life Believing that somehow things aren't as bizarre as they are Who's crazy The one who can't cope Or maybe the one who'll still hope The one who sees doctors or the one who just waits in the car And I was a wild twenty five And I loved a wife so alive But now I believe I would settle for one who can drive The round blue ones with food but not with the oblong white ones The white ones with the round yellow Ones but not the trapezoidal green ones Split the green ones into thirds with a tiny chisel Use a mortar and pestal to grind... My Psychopharmacologist and I It's like an odd romance Intense and very intimate We do our dance My Psychopharmacologist and I Call it a lovers' game He knows my deepest secrets I know his... name! And though he'll never hold me He'll always take my calls It's truly like he told me Without a little lift the ballerina falls Goodman, Diana Bipolar depressive with delusional episodes 16 year history of medication Adjustment after one week I've got less anxiety, But I have headaches, blurry vision, and i can't feel my toes So, we'll try again and eventually we'll get it right Not a very exact science, is it? Zoloft and Paxil and Buspar and Xanax Depakote, Klonopin, Ambien, Prozac Ativan calms me when i see the bills These are a few of my favorite pills Ooh, thank you, Doctor Valium is my favorite color How'd ya know? Goodman, Diana Second adjustment after three weeks Delusions less frequent but depressive state worse I'm nauseous, and I'm constipated, Completely lost my appetite and gained 6 pounds, which ya know, is just not fair May cause the following side effects, one or more Dizziness, drowsiness, sexual dysfunction Headaches and tremors and nightmares and seizures (Diarrhea, constipation, nervous laughter, palpitations) Anxiousness, anger, exhaustion, insomnia Nervousness, lethargy, nausea, vomiting Odd and alarming sexual feelings Oh and one last thing Use may be fatal Use may be fatal Use may be fatal Goodman, Diana Third adjustment after five weeks Reports continued mild anxiety and some lingering depression I now can't feel my fingers or my toes I sweat profusely for no reason Fortunately, i have absolutely no desire for sex Although, whether thats the Medicine or the marriage is anybody's guess I'm sure its the medicine Oh, thank you, that's very sweet But my husband's waiting in the car Who's crazy The one who's half gone Or maybe the one who holds on Remembering when she was twenty, and brilliant and bold And i was so young, and so dumb, and now i am old And she was wicked and wired The sex was simply inspired Now there's no sex She's depressed and me i'm just tired, tired, tired, tired Who's crazy The one who's uncured Or maybe the one who's endured The one who has treatments or the one who just lives with the pain And though he'll never hold me He'll always take my calls Its truly like he told me Without a little lift the ballerina falls My Psychopharmacologist and I Together side by side Without him I'd die My Pyschopharmacologist and I They say love is blind But believe me love is insane Goodman, Diana Seven weeks I don't feel like myself I mean, I don't feel anything Hmm Patient stable