Open the Door, Richard

Open the door, Richard Open the door and let me in Open the door, Richard Richard, why don't you open that door? I met Old Zeke standin' on the corner the other day That cat sure was booted with liquid (He was what?) He was abnoxicated (He was what?) He was inebriated (He was what?) Well, he was just plain drunk (Well, all right then) He sure was salty with the bartender The bartender's tryin' to make him buy another drink Zeke told the bartender, "Ain't no need of me buyin' no drinks When everybody else is buyin' 'em I'm gonna drink to everybody's health, 'til I ruin my own" Open the door, Richard! Why, he don't know who he's throwin' outta that joint Why, I'll go back in that joint And take a short stick And bust it down to the ground! Open the door, Richard! But I hate to be caught out on the street like this 'Cause it makes you look so common And I know I ain't common, 'cause I got class I ain't never used yet But I guess I'd better get on in the house 'Cause I don't want my pastor to catch me out like this Hey, Richard, open the door! Now look at that old woman across the street Done stuck her head outta the window, callin' her sister Look at her hunchin', her sister sayin', "Ain't that him, ain't that him?" Yes, it's me and I'm drunk again! Open the door, Richard! I know he's in there, 'cause I got on the clothes They can't throw him out, 'cause I owe just as much back rent here as he does Imagine that old woman chargin' us three Dollars a month And gettin' mad 'cause we 12 months in the arrears Come 'n' meetin' me last Thursday sayin' "Ain't you boys goin' gimme some back rent?" I told her she'd be lucky if she got some front rent Open the door, Richard! (Hey, Richard, open the door!) 'Cause I'm standin' here scratchin' in my pants pocket, and Standin' here gropin' in my coat pocket, and Standin' here feelin' in my shirt pocket, and I can't find the key Hey, open the door, Richard! Open the door, Richard Open the door and let me in Open the door, Richard Richard, why don't you open that door? Open the door, Richard!