Down On The Farm

One, two One, two All I need is some inspiration Before I do somebody some harm I feel just like a vegetable Down here on the farm Nobody comes to see me Nobody here to turn me on I ain't even got a lover Down here on the farm They told me to get healthy They told me to get some sun But boredom eats me like cancer Down here on the farm Drinking lemonade shandy Ain't nobody here to do me harm But I'm like a fish out of water Down here on the farm I write a thousand letters Till my fingers all gone numb But I never see no postman Down here on the farm I call my baby on the telephone I say, "Come down and have some fun" But she knows what the score is Down here on the farm I can't fall in love with a wheatfield I can't fall in love with a barn When everything smells like horse shit Down here on the farm Blue skies and swimming pools Add so much charm But I'd rather be back in Soho Than down here on the farm On the fucking farm Are you born in a fucking barn or what? (Baaaa!) Hold still