Highs & Lows

My mind is a tug of war, back and forth on what I should do There's thoughts that I wanna pour, but I have no one to pour 'em to I reach out to get ignored, I feel depressed and I blame you All this pain that I endured, left me broken and split in two Swear I only have two modes – all-time highs and all-time lows I can't get of grip of myself, so I just sit and I yell And I'm trying not to lose hope I lost everyone I had close, no wonder why I feel alone Sometimes I wanna grab ropes, stick my neck in a noose, dangle and let my ass choke I'm sick of love being the reason I'm hurt I'm sick of love being the reason I'm hurt I'm sick of giving my heart, I'm sick of playing my part Just for you to let me down when I put you first Fuck you, I mean literally fuck you Girl, I don't even need you I'm on the rise and I wouldn't wanna be you If I got one wish, I'd wish I didn't see you My depression's depressing, it's taking control of me I'm losin' myself and I can't get a hold of me I see my reflection and don't even know it's me I feel alone and they don't even notice me But how can I blame them when I'm out of line? One minute I'm sad and the next I am fine There's so much inconsistency in my mind Just know that I'm trying I don't know, where to go, highs and lows It's got me feelin' lost again I don't know, where to go, highs and lows It's got me thinkin' it is the end Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe Broken, empty Pain, envy Love, deadly Lust, tempting I just want to feel somethin' right now, anything, anything I'd give my all to smile right now, everything, everything I'm so sick of crying, I just wanna die Thoughts of suicide, just know I lost hope Say I victimize, give me weak advice Like I'm lying just to get likes on my post Say it's in my mind, say I never try Like you know me, sorry, you really don't Why'd I even try to tell you my side, when deep in your eyes I'm just a big joke? Tryna live lately feels like a chore I fight in my mind since my mind is at war I stare at my phone 'cause I'm tryna ignore that I realized there's no point in life anymore And it sucks, I lost touch of the real me Is there anyone out there that feels me? 'Cause my hope is decreasing severely I scream to God and it's like he don't hear me, so I sit in silence, my mind's in control of me I know this isn't what life is supposed to be Is there anyone around? 'Cause it's only me I lost everyone that's ever been close to me But how can I blame them when I'm out of line? One minute I'm sad and the next I am fine There's so much inconsistency in my mind Just know that I'm trying I don't know, where to go, highs and lows It's got me feelin' lost again I don't know, where to go, highs and lows It's got me thinkin' it is the end Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe Maybe I just need to breathe Maybe I just need to breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to– I don't know, where to go, highs and lows It's got me feelin' lost again I don't know, where to go, highs and lows It's got me thinkin' it is the end Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe, breathe Maybe I just need to breathe, breathe