Wish I Was Here

In a state of disarray A married fear of missing out And of being there Soul on display I bore a shroud And I shed my shell On the day my stomach burst And butterflies flew out I bathe in turquoise And I sleep in teal Do the blues still register In the colour-blind eye? Don't dim the houselights Don't dim the house My warning light's been on for Some years now We have stayed here far too late And fuck if I can find another way To leave or arrive and make everyone love me Every time Kill yourself with kindness Kill yourself with kindness Or some kind of it You're a killer now I ran my way home And I rode the coattails of A white ambulance On a greying road Got some poor advice From a boy who died Swallowing His own skinny fingers While I had my hand Under a dress At the wedding of A bride I never knew We have stayed here far too late And fuck if I can find another way To leave or arrive and make everyone love me Every time Why'd you say this is the place? I wish it was but I see twenty faces With sharp tongues and honey-coloured eyes Alight I fake the fight And I feign the confidence Am I not A fine and mighty actor? I heard a song And kept humming along To the unpatriotic cry Of a depressed man