Even Kill

I'm waiting here inside my own skin I'm waiting here and I don't know why I thought that I could heal from within But it feels like I'm just picking a fight And I don't know which side of me is winning or losing Right now it's a dead even kill Take it for granted The life that I'm handed I'm stuck between heaven and hell But I want you more than anybody else I'm waiting here where I let you go I'm waiting here and I don't know why I thought that there was no way to know But now I know my instincts were right And I got what I wanted but it feels like I'm loosing Right now we're a dead even kill I took you for granted I'm sorry I did it I pushed us both off of the rails But I want you more than anybody else 'Cause you're the garden I left behind 'Cause you're the garden I, I left behind I chose to, I chose to, I chose to And I got what I wanted but it feels like I'm loosing Right now I'm a dead even kill I took you for granted I'm sorry I did it I pushed us both off of the rails And I got what I wanted but it feels like I'm loosing Right now I'm a dead even kill I took you for granted I'm sorry I did it I pushed us both off of the rails I pushed us both off of the rails But I want you more than anybody else