Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer

Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer We're a notorious couple of cats As knockabout clowns, quick change comedians Tight-rope walkers and acrobats We have an extensive reputation We make our home in Victoria Grove This is merely our centre of operation For we are incurably given to rove We are very well known, in Cornwell Garden In Launceston Place and in Kensington Square We have really a little more reputation Than a couple of cats can very well bare If, the area window is found ajar and the Basement looks like a field of war If a tile or two, comes loose on the roof Which presently fails to be waterproof If the drawers are pulled out, from the bedroom chests And you can't find one of your winter vests If after supper, one of the girls Suddenly misses her Woolworth pearls The family will say, "It's that horrible cat" "Was it Mungojerrie or Rumpleteazer?" And most of the time, they leave it at that Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, have a very unusual gift of the gab We're highly efficient cat burglars as well And remarkably smart at a smash and grab We make our home in Victoria Grove We have no regular occupation We are plausible fellows, who like to engage A friendly policeman in conversation When the family assembles for Sunday dinner With their minds made up that they won't get thinner On Argentine joint, potatoes and greens And the cook will appear from behind the scenes And say in a voice that is broken with sorrow "I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow For the joint has gone, from the oven like that" The family will say, "It's that horrible cat" "Was it Mungojerrie or Rumpleteazer?" And most of the time, they leave it at that Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer Have a wonderful way of working together And some of the time, you would say it was luck And some of the time, you would say it was weather We'd go through the house like a hurricane And, no sober person can take his oath Was it Mungojerrie or Rumpleteazer? Or could you have sworn that, it might have been both? And when you hear, a dining room smash Or up from the pantry there comes, a loud crash Or down from the library there comes, a loud ping From a vase, which is commonly said to be ming The family will say, "Now, which was which cat?" "It was Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer" And there's nothing at all to be done about that