It Ain't a Crime

Johnny was a bad boy, he was a juvenile delinquent He had his picture on the wall of every precinct He had a rep of hanging out with his homies Puffing on the blunts and sipping on the forties But when he spoke, nobody would listen And when he was home, yo his parents they would dis him They called him a bum, a worthless piece of shit So over this he had a fit And now he grabs his bag and heads for the door And walks to the neighborhood liquor store Pulls out a gun, tells the old man, "Hit the floor!" Then breaks open his register drawer Pulls out the money, stuffs it in his pocket Points his pistol, then he starts to cock it The man panics and the gun goes off Stupid old fool made Johnny blow his head off But he don't care 'cause Johnny was taught It ain't a crime if you don't get caught It ain't a crime if you don't get caught It ain't a crime if you don't get caught It ain't a crime if you don't get caught That's how it is, homie, like it or not Now coming out the store, Johnny shot two Hasidic Jews And when he got home, his face was on the news His mom freaked out, told him, "Get the fuck out!" That's when the pigs rolled up, so yo, he ducked out He hit the back door like his name was Carl Lewis Dipped to the payphone to find out where his crew is He called up his homeboy Jose "What up? Can I come over my man?" He said, "No way! A cop was here, he was looking all over for ya But I told the pig I didn't know ya" He said, "Cool, meet me up at the school I need a ride 'cause I'm wanted for homicide" Johnny's got a gun and he's on the run But he don't care, to him the shit's fun Now that he's an outlaw, sorta like Robin Hood The hard rock hero of the whole neighborhood If they catch him, he'll wind up in court But it ain't a crime if you don't get caught It ain't a crime if you don't get caught It ain't a crime if you don't get caught It ain't a crime if you don't get caught That's how it is, homie, like it or not It ain't a crime if you don't get caught It ain't a sale if it don't get bought It ain't a show if I don't get paid She ain't a hoe if you don't get laid