I was born in Singapore
A couple of hours into the war
I said what's all the fighting for?
And no one had an answer
I was born in the old east end
There were shops to lift and cars to mend
I said I quit! This is the end!
I wanna be a dancer
I was born in Palestine
On the Edgware branch of the northern line
Sat next to Paddy Considine
He said you're my favourite actor
I was born in Somerstown
Just before the wall came down
I met a girl she drove me home
On a Massey Ferguson tractor
I was born in Jerusalem
On the 25th of December
When I was born I was so drunk
So drunk that I cannot remember
I was born in En-ger-land
With a pint of beer in my hand
I made a fist, I joined a band
I may have worn a dress
I was born in Bognor Regis
Where they still fight them on the beaches
I was born in A and E on the NHS
I was born in Six Mile Bottom
Where everyone is white as cotton
I ran away I moved to Tottenham
I'm never going back
I was born a European
And that's what I am proud of being
See you in the Coliseum
With a blue and golden flag
I was born in Jerusalem
On the 25th of December
When I was born I was so drunk
So drunk that I cannot remember
I was born with a silver dime
Stuck right up where the sun don't shine
I said that I'd quite like to be
Prime minister of England
They said if you want to be prime minister
You got to act more sinister
More racister
In fact you know what?
Just act like an infant
I was born in the old cowshed
In stripes of blue and white and red
And the man in the gasworks turned and said
At least it isn't raining
I was born on planet earth
And I'm still here for what it's worth
I didn't get a virgin birth
But hey I'm not complaining
I was born in Jerusalem
On the 25th of December
When I was born I was so drunk
So drunk that I cannot remember
