Not in the Blueprint

So much could change if I wanted it to Already so much has changed since I hopped in the booth I got no one to blame if I stop with this music I've been trying to write something I'm just not in the mood I swear this shit is all I have in life but what's it to you The same cats who think they're critics giving props to a goose Mocking my new shit They probably thought I dropped it for views I couldn't care less for opinions when you're not in my shoes I keep tripping over nothing like a knot in my shoes I can't pretend that I've been happy I'm just lost and confused Half a gram mixed with baccy nah that's not going to do it What was i doing Going back to her was Not in the Blueprint I'm an idiot They wonder why I'm locked in a room On some stupid shit I got to stop this constant abuse I'm not used to this there's people trying to use me for a flick Back then I had no one so I'm proper confused People I love turned their back on me for things that they regret In the end it was on me so what can I do All this pressure's like a shotty to my head I'm still trying to make moves If I've got nothing now then what can I lose People I love turned their back on me for things that they regret In the end it was on me so what can I do All this pressures like a shotty to my head but I'm still trying to make moves If I've got nothing now what can I lose It's like the more I try to help myself the harder it gets And I know that shit's bin worse and its half in my head I can't pretend that things are perfect when I'm partially a wreck At least I'm making money now and I ain't starving to death Charge for the feature still cost them like an arm and a leg Ask Marcus I skipped parties to work on my craft instead No lager, just me in the dark with a pen And everyone that came around was coming down from something I don't want to argue with them It comes naturally to some for me it's hard to pretend When I started writing music all my bars were a mess I can't explain the way I felt but I was harboring stress Part of me is scared I know they could be laughing instead Take it back before the drugs when things were half as intense Make it back before the sundown and laugh without sash He faced everything now it's just a mask that he wears