Hold Me In the River

I woke up late and found my liberty lost It had been written down in law as a security cost 28 days - I'm presumed guilty I'm sure as evolution that I wasn't born guilty Hold me in the river till my skin turns blue Slap me on the back and say "Now how do you do?" They say "Eamon tell us how to keep our garden growing" I say "Try lying on the grass thinking of Scarlett Johansson" Throw me to the deck and count backwards from ten Slap me round the face and say "Now do it again" I'm all trained up, yeah, I'm ready for the ring They'll be arriving in capes and leaving in slings Come on, tick your ticker Let me know you're alive There's very little point in being here otherwise Can you tell me now, what is this love? If it comes from above Why does it have to be so painful?