Poor Unfortunate Souls (From "the Little Mermaid")

I admit that in the past I've been a nasty They weren't kidding when they called me, well A witch But you'll find that nowadays I've mended all my ways Repented, seen the light, and made a switch True? Yes And I fortunately know a little secret It's a talent that I always have possessed And here lately, please don't laugh I use it on behalf Of the miserable, the lonely and depressed Pathetic Poor unfortunate souls In pain In need This one longing to be thinner This one wants to get the girl And do I help them? Yes, indeed Those poor unfortunate souls So sad So true They coming flocking to me crying Will you help us, pretty please? And I help them Yes, I do Now it's happened once or twice Someone couldn't pay the price And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals Yes I've had the odd complaint But on the whole I've been a saint To those poor unfortunate souls The men up there don't like a lot of blabber They think a girl who gossips is a bore Yes, on land it's much preferred For ladies not to say a word And after all, dear What is idle prattle for? COME ON! They're not all that impressed with conversation True gentlemen avoid it when they can But they dote and swoon and fawn On ladies who've withdrawn It's she who holds her tongue who gets her man Come on you Poor unfortunate soul Go ahead, make your choice I'm a very busy person and I haven't got all day It won't cost much Just your voice You poor unfortunate souls It's sad But true If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet You've got to pay the toll Take a gulp, take a breath Go ahead and sign the scroll Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her, boys The boss is On a Roll This Poor UnFortunate Souls