Backseat

When I'm sitting in the back seat I be staring at the window, looking for a signal Wishing life was simple, 'cause no one understands me I be living in my head Feel like my spirit is dead I'm just tryna get ahead Anxiety has me feeling like I don't be long So I sit and write these songs There's nobody I can call This all has me feeling so I can't even lie and pretend I feel like I'm on the edge, I want my torment to end I locked all issues out, but they just keep barging' in I fell so many fucking times I can't get up again Devil keeps playing games, think I'm letting him win I wake up everyday battling the pain I'm against I feel alone, this is how my whole life has been They see me as a percentage, or a flex to they friends It fucked up, fuck love 'cause I don't wanna hear about it I don't even drink but get a bottle I'ma down it Even in an empty room I'm feeling like it's hella crowded Cuz my demons steady creeping in and leaving me surrounded I just wanna walk away And I swear I got a lot to say Maybe I should pray God find me, 'cause I'm lost These are always in my thoughts (my thoughts) When I'm sitting in the back seat I be staring at the window, looking for a signal Wishing life was simple, 'cause no one understands me I be living in my head Feel like my spirit is dead I'm just tryna get ahead Anxiety has me feeling like I don't belong So I sit and write these songs There's nobody I can call This all has me (this all has me) (Shit got me fucked up, for real) Sometimes I like to go for a ride And play the music loud just so I can quiet my mind My thoughts trickle in The voices keep feeding me lies I push them aside I run, but they gonna always arrive I need-a run run, needed someone But I never did find love 'Cause I feel like it don't exist And that's my ex fault And that's my fault to Cuz I should've ran But I took her back again But it's okay, I'll take blame for it And I know that karmas real, and she gon' pay for it And she promised a better future, and I stayed for it Now my heart is cold and walled off 'Cause there's no place for it So I'm about to move on I would rather be alone Trauma that I carry from a broken home Got me hit hitting different lows Tryna stay under control But my thoughts? They just tend to roam (they tend to roam) When I'm sitting in the back seat I be staring at the window, looking for a signal Wishing life was simple, 'cause no one understands me I be living in my head Feel like my spirit is dead I'm just tryna get ahead Anxiety has me feeling like I don't belong So I sit and write these songs There's nobody I can call This all has me (this all has me, yeah)