Going Blue (alt version)

Another day has ended, I am all alone

Look at the water in the walls

Mold that's overgrown

I thought I'd be excited

I'm finally of age

There's whiskey in the freezer

I don't wanna celebrate

And I don't know if I'm cut out for this

Wish I was, most days, I'm not

It's the look my mother has when she says I'm going bad

And she wonders if I'll always be this lost

My hands are shaking bad

I just found out

What the hell am I to do?

Kicking gravel by your house

A few weeks ago, in the San Francisco Bay

We slept inside the car

I turned twenty-two that day

I don't know if I'm cut out for this

Wish I was, I'm just a kid

I don't know if I'm cut out for this

Wish I was, most days, I'm not

And I can't remember when I didn't feel

Like I'm inside someone else's body, someone I forgot