Tacky

It might seem crazy, wearing stripes and plaid

I Instagram every meal I've had

All my used liquor bottles are on display

We can go to see a show but I'll make you pay

Because I'm tacky

Wear my belt with suspenders and sandals with my socks

Because I'm tacky

Got some new glitter Uggs and lovely pink sequined Crocs

Because I'm tacky

Never let you forget some favor I did for you

Because I'm tacky

If you're okay with that, you might just be tacky too

I meet some chick, ask her this and that

Like are you pregnant, girl, or just really fat?

Well, now I'm dropping names almost constantly

That's what Kanye West keeps telling me, here's why

Because I'm tacky

Wear my Ed Hardy shirt with fluorescent orange pants

Because I'm tacky

Got my new resume, it's printed in Comic Sans

Because I'm tacky

Think it's fun threatening waiters with a bad Yelp review

Because I'm tacky

If you think that's just fine, then you're probably tacky too

Bring me shame, can't nothin'

Bring me shame, and never known why

Bring me shame, can't nothin'

Bring me shame, I said

Bring me shame, can't nothin'

Bring me shame, it's pointless to try

Bring me shame, can't nothin'

Bring me shame, I said

Because I'm tacky

43 bumper stickers and a, YOLO, license plate

Because I'm tacky

Bring along my coupon book whenever I'm on a date

Because I'm tacky

Practice my twerking moves in line at the DMV

Because I'm tacky

Took the whole bowl of restaurant mints, hey, it said they're free

Because I'm tacky

I get drunk at the bank and take off my shirt, at least

Because I'm tacky

I would live-tweet a funeral, take selfies with the deceased

Because I'm tacky

If I'm bitten by a zombie, I'm probably not tellin' you

Because I'm tacky

If you don't think that's bad, guess what? Then you're tacky too