Poor Thing

You got a room over the shop, haven't you? If times is so hard, why don't you rent it out? People think it's haunted Haunted? Yeah, and who's to say they're wrong? You see, years ago something happened up there Something not very nice There was a barber and his wife And he was beautiful A proper artist with a knife But they transported him for life And he was beautiful Barker his name was Benjamin Barker What was his crime? Foolishness He had this wife, ya see Pretty little thing Silly little nit Had her chance for the moon on a string Poor thing! Poor thing! There was this judge, ya see Wanted her like mad! Every day he sent her a flower But did she come down from her tower? Sat up there and sulked by the hour Poor fool! Ah, but there was worse yet to come Poor thing! Well, Beadle calls on her all polite Poor thing! Poor thing! The judge, he tells her, is all contrite He blames himself for her dreadful plight She must come straight to his house tonight! Poor thing! Poor thing! Of course when she goes there Poor thing, poor thing They're having this ball all in masks There's no one she knows there Poor dear, poor thing She wanders, tormented and drinks, poor thing! The judge has repented, she thinks, poor thing! "Oh where is Judge Turpin?" she asks He was there, alright! Only not so contrite! She wasn't no match for craft, ya see And everyone thought it so droll They figured she had to be daft, ya see So all of them stood there and laughed, ya see Poor soul! Poor thing! NO! Would no one have mercy on her? So it is you, Benjamin Barker No! Not Barker, that man is dead It's Todd now, Sweeney Todd And he will have his revenge