Who Put the Pecker On the Snowman

Who put the pecker on the snowman?

And shiny balls from our Christmas tree

Our old flag pole that said home sweet home

Now resembles a ding-a-ling

Hung mistletoe where pubic hair would grow

And a bra to hold those double Ds

Who put the pecker on the snowman?

Hanging proud for the neighbors to see

It was snowing hard in Nashville

Worst winter we had ever seen

Icy roads, 'least a foot of snow

There's a snowman near the end of the street

Someone got bored, snuck onto our front porch

Stole the flagpole off the beam

There the snowman stood, pecker made of wood

Home sweet home blowing in the breeze

Who put the pecker on the snowman?

And shiny balls from our Christmas tree

Our old flag pole that said home sweet home

Now resembles a ding-a-ling

Hung mistletoe where pubic hair would grow

And a bra to hold those double Ds

Who put the pecker on the snowman?

And embarrassed the family

It was time to find the culprit of the crime

Figure out who could be so cruel

What twisted soul could use our flagpole

To give a snowman a three foot tool

She apologized for her perverted crime

Pleaded guilty, she knew it was wrong

She said, "You must agree, he was not complete

'Til I added that three foot schlong"

Who put the pecker on the snowman?

And shiny balls hanging to his knees

Our old flag pole that said home sweet home

Just dangles in the breeze

Our dad's ego took a heavy blow

'Cause his tool could not compete

Who put the pecker on the snowman?

Hanging proud for the neighbors to see

Mama put the pecker on the snowman

And shiny balls from our Christmas tree

And our old flag pole that said home sweet home

Now resembles a ding-a-ling

She hung mistletoe where pubic hair would grow

And a bra to hold those double Ds

I said mama put the pecker on the snowman

Hanging proud for the neighbors to see

I said mama put the pecker on the snowman

It's hanging proud for the neighbors to see