I'll Drink to That!

When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!" (BEER!) Now if you're like most of us raised around here Then you must have started your drinking with beer We learned how to flirt with the lads at the bar And to ring out a toast for all friends near and far! When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!" (CIDER!) When burning desire has got you quite vexed When need for a partner has left you perplexed Just grab a fine cider and ring your own bell The use of your own hand will satisfy well! When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!" (RUM!) The young men all eager to do what they should If they could just do more than just only look good Let rum's sweet elixir distract from your plight At least a good bottle might last through the night! When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!" (VODKA!) Now vodka's the best thing for mending a heart Just open a bottle and toast your new start If a second reminds you of his shortcomings Then open a third one and BURN ALL HIS THINGS! When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!" (WHISKEY!) Now whiskey's the best choice for sending off kin For toasting their stories of virtue and sin We'll drink, laugh and weep 'til we're all good and tight And if it's a good wake it'll end in a fight! When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!" (ABSINTHE!) With absinthe the party did take a sharp turn You fought with green fairies, woke up in a fern But all will be well if you clean up the mess Just get rid of the corpse in the Tinkerbell dress! When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!" (LAST CALL!) When life gives you comedy or tragedy We'll tap another vat Raise your voice with mine and say "I'll drink to that!"