Hypocrite

Yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah You ever get some people so motivated But slowly you feel your strength decline? Always uplifting people's soul But you're breaking down internally, that's what you hide But you're the power source for so many lives You give them hope, you're alive, that's why Feel like my life is built on so many lies but if I chose just to die, I'd I'd just be a hypocrite I'd just be a hypocrite I'd just be a hypocrite I'd just be a hypocrite So many people using me for therapy, yeah, yeah But truth be told, I ain't been taking care of me, yeah, yeah But can't nobody notice it apparently, yeah, yeah I do so well at hiding it for clarity, yeah, yeah I'm mean it, no kidding, yeah apparently, yeah My kids love me but I feel I'm failing parenting, yeah, yeah But that's the price I pay, I guess it's fair I see, yeah For a fare I see, yeah, call it heresy How can I tell you, "Be sober" while drinking? Rolling this weed up, I know what you're thinking So positive what I wrote with my ink pen Hero, that's right, by night more so like Kingpin Give you comfort while my soul is depleting One justice circle, won't go to the precinct Keep it together, it's so hard to pretend Pull my own card like a photo ID then I know I'm supposed to be a pillar of strength Me and baby mama beef, ain't seen my kid in a week The other day I drove around until my whip was on E Put the pistol to my head, but chose to live because peep I know I got a bunch of soldiers that's depending on me I gotta get myself together, I've been feeling so weak But if mental health matters is the shit that I preach But pull the trigger, then what kind of hypocrite would I be? Question You ever get some people so motivated But slowly you feel your strength decline Always uplifting people's soul But you're breaking down internally, that's what you hide But you're the power source for so many lives You give them hope you're alive, that's why Feel like my life is built on so many lies but if I chose just to die, I'd I'd just be a hypocrite I'd just be a hypocrite I'd just be a hypocrite I'd just be a hypocrite Though a positive mindset, my brain isn't innocent When subcortical structures and limbic bend a bit The trauma we beat, but we haven't been too tentative It's normal to reoccur as a given stimulant Try funding this cost 'til we end up indigent Or insufficient, broke, it doesn't make any sense I really get flat 'cause I give so many this Uplifting agenda, but then I feel my triggers get Pulled and my mask goes in the wind again So sick of losing and wondering when I'll win again How do we spread love when it isn't in us then? But people make it real and then within they implement If I'm the reason why you chose to live but in the end I didn't wanna do it, would you quit and come with me then? It's never false hope, but this shit gets intricate I won't quit, word to dementia, forget a hypocrite