Loveless

I feel like a housewife in a loveless marriage with myself My inner child is a handful, my bookshelf It is neglected, all the stories left unread And God I used to live so many lives Talking to the ghosts on my walk home To the notes in my cellphone To myself, and I remind her that I like to be alone What kind of friend would I even be What kind of person would I wanna meet Am I really happy on my own Do I really wanna throw away my phone I wonder if it's easier for me to let myself care When the other person doesn't really wanna be there 'Cause I get scared I try so damn hard to make everything my fault, don't I? Don't I I try so damn hard to make everything my fault, but I lie. Do I Maybe it's all in my head, but the internet says ADHD hurts couples, for bisexuals the risk of abuse doubles My remaining instincts left with you, but am I lying through my teeth Am I lying through my teeth 'Cause I'm haunted by my shifting approach withdrawal Am I ever gonna really wanna fall Am I ever gonna really wanna fall And I'm at my happiest when I'm lonely as hell I miss voices but my choice is to hide in the silence It's too goddamn loud in my head when I don't leave my bed But I need the peace and I can't take any other kinda noise I try so damn hard to make everything my fault, don't I? Don't I I try so damn hard to make everything my fault, but I lie. Do I I try so damn hard to make everything my fault, don't I? Don't I I try so damn hard to make everything my fault, but I lie. Do I History is bound to be repeated and I'm terrified 'Cause when I said I never wanna try again I think I lied I think I, I think I lied I think I, I think I lie